Never never never . . . Settle! The message on the back of my shirt truly resonates with me today. Never settle for less than you deserve. Never diminish your value so others can afford you.
I remember early in my career, I was a people pleaser, trying to do everything right, so the people I worked with would value me. Worked late nights, weekends, joined every committee. I just wanted them to know that I was an asset to the organization, I deserved to be there, and at my core, I wanted their approval.
Most of my colleagues were amazing, but for a few it never seemed enough. There was still the snark in meetings, the backbiting attempts to put me in my place, the reminder over and over again that I was a guest, even with tenure, even as a full professor.
And that was eating at my soul y’all. Until I took an accounting of my own worth. Until I realized I was more than enough, maybe even too much for those who felt intimidated by me. By the time I left. I wasn’t searching for their approval, rather I wondered if I approved of the way they were working. Just sharing this to say in that position, working to be accepted, I settled for less than I was worth and when I gave others the power to determine my value, I always came up short. But the devil is a lie and you are always more than enough and those around you won’t be able to deny your worth, when you are in the place you are meant to be in heart, mind, and spirit. So, “listen” to my shirt y’all and “Never Settle!”
**All these long posts, I may need to relaunch my blog!